porn / women

Why Lady Porn Day Is a Sexy Reminder

It was Lady Porn Day last Tuesday over at rabbitwrite.com and all week women have been sharing their relationships to porn.

The basic manifesto of this day and week has been this:

Girls aren’t encouraged to talk to each other about porn– the same way we aren’t encouraged to talk to each other about masturbation. In girl-world, too often we expect our first orgasm to come from a partner. Then we expect our Sex-and-The-City approved hitachi-orgasms to come from, well, our closed eyes. But porn is just another tool for your sexual growth. And according to statistics more women are watching porn than ever, growing stronger in our silence apparently.

Tuning into this discussion made me reflect on the fact that my friends and I still don’t really talk about porn and if we do it’s not in the—“Hey, go check this hot shit out,” manner. We certainly didn’t share porn growing up. And that’s one of the reasons that pre husband filming gangbangs, I’d had so little exposure to porn and automatically judged it as degrading. As a bookish prude, I explored my sexuality through racy novels; not because I’m not visual but because I didn’t know or have access to what was out there. Even throughout my twenties, I rarely shushed my judgments long enough to go find out if there was porn that did it for me. Aux contraire, my husband and his friends, like most men, definitely talked about and traded their smut. In fact, they continue to share a subscription to VideoBox. After my newly minted trucker mouth earned me a place in the boy’s club, I was given the password, but I never use it. It’s pretty mainstream fare, not totally my cup of tea. But it got me thinking about what subscription my friends and I would share if we were to hop on the bandwagon. Since discovering that I do like porn, I’ll admit that I’ve tended to be kind of lazy about my viewing habits, deferring to a standby selection of courtesy-of-husband downloaded flicks and relying on the free for all of RedTube and YouPorn. That said, I’ve been intending to find more and better material. So, on that note, I think places for me to further investigate and invest in would be goodvibes.com and also lustcinema.com. Perhaps I’ll see if any of my gal pals want to go in on some minutes. At the very least, this week is a good reminder for us ladies to keep it real and keep discussing porn.

Thanks, Rachel Rabbit White.

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