men / Relationships / Sex / women

After Sex Cuddles

Check out this “My After Sex Buddy” commercial. It’s pretty entertaining even if the “men don’t cuddle” stereotype is a little hackneyed. The truth is, I’ve never been with a man who didn’t snuggle (or at least sleep tangled up) after sex, having grown up in the land of single mother reared, sensitive-new-age men. But I guess they still exist as exhibited here:


Now, if I were to cozy up to a microwavable snuggle toy (yes, this doughboy heats up), my reasoning would simply be that cuddle toys don’t sweat or smother me. As I’ve mentioned before, I usually spoon my darling husband for approximately three minutes before rolling over to sleep. That is the amount of time it takes before he grows dewy and I need to retreat. My man, on the other hand, would happily sleep nestled in a snuggle fest, AKA: asphyxiating me with his bicep and slowing the blood flow to my extremities with his tree trunk legs draped over my relative twigs.

What I do bemoan about his post-coital state is the insta-sleep reflex. Whereas he usually passes out in 2.5 seconds, after nookie he has a steady 1.5 narcoleptic drop off rate. This I envy. But the solution doesn’t seem to be a novelty snuggle toy, for I want to sleep, too, not spoon. I suppose there’s always red wine and Ambien. Too bad that sounds a little less novelty, and a little more neurosis.

Alas, I’d happily pick the narcotics. Hubby can keep the cuddle toy.

2 thoughts on “After Sex Cuddles

  1. My son is 7 months old. I had him nauratally without medication and I did not have a episiotomy (where they cut you) is your vagina skin still sensitive? Like when you pee does it still hurt? ( My skin stretched down there and that is why I was burning not like any other reason) If not I think you should be fine. My husband and I only waited 9 days , and it still was burning when i p\’d but it was just fine. Make sure to use some sort of lubricant though we used the plain ky jelly. If you did have an episiotomy it may be different for you. I breast feed and I have not had a period yet, so that helps to keep your menses at bay for a while and prevent conception, but if you are not bfing make sure your man wears a condom or get on birth control. I hope that is helpful. Was this answer helpful?

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