communication / Internet / living / money

Bank of America Cares About Me

So I returned home from a week in Montreal the other day to find a message from Bank of America. Low and behold, they’d put a freeze on my card. Since this seems to happen every time I set foot out of the state of California, I wasn’t exactly surprised.

I rang up my dear friends at BOA to delight in an hour of verification questions and a urine sample, and was eventually told by a monosyllabic operator that  “my card had been compromised.”

What does that mean? I said.

Well, Mizz Southwood it means that we here at Bank of America, who monitor your card 24 hours a day, seven days a week, have noticed that your card has been compromised.

I got that part, but what does that mean exactly?

Well, Mizz Southwood it means that we have received a notice that some or all of the information on your card may have been compromised. It may have happened online.

Okay, well that still doesn’t really answer my question but now what?

Well, because we take your card protection very seriously at Bank of America and monitor your activity 24 hours a day, seven days a week, we are going to cancel this card and send you a new one in five to seven business days, Mizz Southwood.

Five to seven business days?

Yes, Mizz Southwood. You can expect to receive your new, uncompromised card in the mail.

That’s not really all that convenient is it?

We are sorry for any inconvenience, Mizz Southwood but since your card has been compromised we need to cancel your old one and send you a new one.

I guess it’s lucky for me that I recently accepted on of the three hundred credit card offers you send us debt ridden folks every week.

Can I help you with anything else today, Mizz Southwood?

You could buy me a drink with your uncompromised  bank card.

Thank you for choosing Bank of America, Mizz Southwood and have a nice day.




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